Loved You Since the Previous Life

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CASE STUDY

With great respect to Luangphaw.

I would like to recount my life story and ask for the loving-kindness of Luang Phaw to Dream in Dream for me.

In 1996 when I was 31 years old, I had just given birth to my third child a little more than a year earlier. At that time, I started to grow ill. I had strong pains in my legs and almost lacked the strength to walk. I went to a doctor who prescribed medicine but when I took it, my heart quivered. My heart beat became very strong as though it would burst. My leg pains did not go away.

An older man I knew from the hospital suggested I visit a spiritualist doctor. The spiritualist doctor rubbed betel leaves over the painful areas. There was a bad-smelling liquid with blood and pus that stuck to the betel leaves. After this, he gave me Thai herbal medicine to take. He treated me for another month and my leg pains disappeared. But my heart continued to beat rapidly and I tired easily as a result.

My heart beat more than 100 times per minute. Moreover, I felt as though a lump was stuck in my throat and I could not eat. At the suggestion of the older man I knew from the hospital, I went to see a masseuse. The masseuse was a 50 year-old married woman. When she felt around to see what was causing the problem, she immediately said that I had a thyroid problem. The doctor at the hospital had not successfully diagnosed the cause of my ailment because something was being blocked.

I had to remain under the care of the masseuse for many months without returning home. She put her fingers down my throat every day. When she finished, I would vomit up large amounts of phlegm and blood every time. She put her fingers down my throat every day for 3 months. My symptoms began to improve.

While I was under her care, she would come lay beside me as a friend, gently massaging me and blow magic spells on me. My symptoms gradually improved. After she started laying down and hugging me, she would have me support her arms sometimes. It was as though she loved and felt tenderly for me. I did not mind because I wanted to cure my disease. Later she started telling me that the 3rd sorcerer had appeared in her dreams. He told her that he would take care of me himself because I had been his wife in a past life. He had been seeking me for 100 years.

One day while we were laying together, the masseuse told me that her head felt quite heavy. Then she fell fast asleep. But I did not sleep. A little while later, the masseuse’s body began to move as though she had awakened. Her voice changed and became sonorous and very polite. She told me about my past life when I liked to speak sarcastically, only felt concerned about my own well-being, and ran away from the him in many lives.

Later, she let me be a masseuse. I told her I could not do it because I lacked the strength. But she told me not to be scared and that she would help me. I promised her that if I recovered, I would do as she asked. After this she demonstrated her love for me. She pretended to be a young man with me constantly.

I permitted her to have sexual relations with me. I did not see any harm in it. She helped my life by curing me and she conducted a ceremony to change the lines on the palms of my hands so that I could massage other patients and not harm their muscles. She also taught me massage techniques. After this, I started massaging people in Bangkok while continuing to go see her and continue our relationship.

The masseuse’s husband showed his jealousy concerning his wife, as though he knew that there was a relationship between me and the masseuse. My own husband died while I was pregnant with my third child. Sometimes I asked her if we were violating the precepts. She said it was not wrong but I still feared committing a sin. I thought that one day something would happen as a result of our behavior. And what I had not expected at all in my life occurred.

At the end of 2003, I got to know one man. He was kind but he had one fault: he liked to drink alcohol. He drank every day but he liked me and courted me. So I joked with him that if he could stop drinking, I would consider being his partner, perhaps even loving him.

At the beginning of 2004, he called me to say that he had stopped drinking alcohol completely and reminded me of the promise I had made to him. I tried to avoid him. He located me at the house. In the end, I had to give in and sleep with him. But after doing this 3-4 times, I stopped because when I slept with him, I felt hot and vomited every time.

News of my relationship with him traveled to the ears of the masseuse. She was very angry with me. She told me that he had ensnared a teacher she had invited to help with my treatment. This has almost led to her death because she had taken out her heart and left it with me to protect me. Otherwise, I would have died a long time ago. The masseuse took me to see a spiritualist doctor.

The spiritualist doctor performed a ceremony to remove the masseuse’s heart from me. Then he called for my spiritual awareness to return. As for the heart, he led it back to the masseuse. While the ceremony was in progress, I felt indifferent. She cried the entire time. The spiritualist doctor said that he could not remove all the magic that that man had done because he had lodged it deeply in me.

After this, I went with the masseuse to ordain as nuns at a nearby temple. The man called and asked for her to forgive him. But she would not forgive him. While we were nuns, she would vomit. She told me that she had been the victim of black magic. The organs in her gut had been twisted and her teeth had been hidden. She said that if the spell was withdrawn, her condition would return to normal.

After we had been nuns, her mother unexpectedly became very ill. She could not see and could not walk. The spiritualist doctor we had consulted before said that an ogre ghost had caused her mother’s problems. This ogre ghost had been raised by the man and had possessed me. But the spiritualist doctor said he could not help in this situation.

When she saw that the spiritualist doctor could not exorcise the ogre ghost, she thought that she would have to be the doctor and exorcise the ghost herself.

She performed a ceremony to call spiritual teachers to come. She had me lie down and put my hands in a gesture of prayer. She lit candles, chanted incantations, walked around me, and dripped wax into a spittoon.

After the ceremony ended, she led me to a hollow cavity that she had prepared at the edge of a canal. Then she buried me in dirt so only my head still showed. Then she chanted funeral prayers.

While I was in the cavity, I felt like many small animals came and crawled all over me until I felt stinging and itchy all over my body. After this she had my younger brother who had come to help with the ceremony chant funeral prayers then remove me from the cavity. Then they bathed me in holy water.

The next day they began the rite to exorcise the ogre ghost. She had me lie on my back and take of my shirt. Then she rubbed me with the red paste used with betel and chanted incantations. She rubbed in on me from my stomach to my chest.

After this, she took a pineapple stem and rubbed it all over my body until I felt the sting and itch everywhere. Yet this was not enough for her. She had me lie down and wrapped me up as though I was a corpse. Then she used clay to form a 2 heart shapes and placed them on the left side of my chest. She stuck a magical knife into the clay hearts.

She asked the ogre ghost which she believed had possessed me: “Will you leave this body? Why did you come?” There were many other questions which I do not remember. She asked over and over again for answers.

I decided to break up the annoying situation by pretending that I was the ghost and saying: “I’m leaving. I won’t come back again.” This answer satisfied her and she ended the ceremony.

My younger brother who came to help with the ceremony when I was buried in the cavity, when the ceremony ended, he refused to return home and sleep. After 3 days, my mother wanted to come to the masseuse’s house. She had to find him at his friend’s house to take her there.

While driving to the masseuse’s house, he told her that somebody had told him to stop the car 3 times. He stopped 3 times along the way to buy things. When they arrived at the masseuse’s house, the masseuse threw chili, salt, shallots, garlic, and rice on my brother while chanting spells.

When these items hit his body, he said “Why are you calling for my mind? I haven’t done anything wrong.” Then he fell on his back on the ground.The masseuse used her foot to stomp on his stomach until a burping sound came from his stomach.

After a while he regained consciousness. He was still muddled, wondering how he got to her house. After this, she bathed him in holy water. After I had returned home from staying with the masseuse that time, I ordained as a nun for 10 days. After disrobing, I returned home, determined to study dhamma from DMC. A kalayanamitra who was a nearby neighbor installed the DMC dish for me.

After this, I kept the 8 precepts on Buddhist days until now. My daughter had the opportunity to come to the temple before me. She went to the temple with a kalayanamitra who was one of my customers.

Later I came to the temple with my daughter. When our car neared the entrance to the temple, I cried with happiness. When I arrived at the temple, I could not stop crying. My happiness was very deep, as though I had returned to my original home. I felt a warmth I cannot describe.

My daughter was responsible for greeting visitors. After this, I brought my two sons with me to make merit together. My 2 sons had the opportunity to carry flags at the front of the procession for monks who had completed the highest (ninth) level of monastic education.

I tried to be a kalayanamitra to the masseuse to have her learn about the Dream in Dream Kindergarten School. But she was not satisfied.

Questions:

1. What demerit led me to have leg pains and no energy, such that I could not walk? Why was I unable to cure this problem until I went to the spiritualist doctor?
When the spiritualist doctor used betel leaves there was a bad-smelling liquid with blood and pus that stuck to the leaves. What was this?

2. What demerit caused me to have a very rapid heartbeat and my heart to quiver? Why was I unable to breathe quickly enough to supply my heart with oxygen? Why did I have a feeling that my throat was constricted and I could not breathe? Why did I need to have fingers stuck down my throat daily and vomit phlegm and blood for 3 months?

3. Presently I still have the constricted feeling in my throat sometimes, as though something is stuck in my throat and there is a bone jammed in my throat? What demerit is causing this?
Will I have the chance to recover from this? Will my thyroid problems return?

4. What demerit caused me to be placed in a cavity, wrapped up like a corpse, rubbed with betel paste, and rubbed with pineapple leaves until I felt a stinging itch all over my body?
Where did the insects that bit me while I was in the cavity come from, even though there were not any insects when the masseuse dug the cavity.

5. What demerit caused me and the masseuse to have a gay affair? Was her behavior due to abnormal gender psychology or was it because the 3rd sorcerer was in her?
Her husband was very jealous. Did I violate the precept forbidding adultery?

6. If there is the 3rd sorcerer, who is he? How was he connected to me and the masseuse in the past?
Presently, do I have a sorcerer who is with me to help me perform massage? I am small and thin and my hands are tiny but I can massage people all day long.
Was it true that she successfully performed a ceremony to change the pattern on the palms of my hands?

7. Did the man with whom I had sexual relations have powers of black magic? Did he perform black magic on me and the masseuse?

8. Did I, the masseuse, and the man with whom I had sexual relations ever have anything to do with one another in the past?
Why did she get angry at me and hate this man so much? What can I do to make her understand and to have her forgive me and this man?

9. When my younger brother drove the car to the masseuse’s house, what did he mean when he said “Why are you calling for my mind?”?
Who possessed him? What was the voice that told him to stop the car three times? Why did the voice command him to stop?

10. What demerit caused me to be a masseuse? I wish that I will not be a masseuse in my next life. Will my wish come true?
My occupation as a masseuse requires me to pay respect to my spiritual teachers and chant incantations. If I continue in this occupation, do I need to be with my spiritual teachers after I die?
What can I do about this because I want to go to Tusita (the fourth level of heaven)?

11. Why did it take so long for me to come to the temple, even though kalayanamitra and a relative of my husband’s grandmother tried to invite me to the temple for more than 10 years?
What were the results of my Buddhist practice in the past?
How can I correct the pattern of my life? Do I have any chance to go to Tusita (the fourth level of heaven)?
If I wish that I will be a man and ordain in all of my future lives until I reach the end of the cycle of existence, will I succeed in this wish in my next life?

12. How did my 3 children make merit with the Dhammakaya community in the past? Will my 2 sons have enough merit to ordain for the rest of their lives?

I would like to pay my highest respect to Luang Phaw.

Luang Phaw's Dream

I closed my eyes, dreamed and woke up with these answers.
When you tell anybody the story like a tale, it will make anyone know more about retribution (Law of Kamma)

1. You had leg pains and no energy, such that you could not walk. You were unable to cure this problem until I went to the spiritualist doctor? This is because of your past demerit when you were born into an agricultural society. You bound up animals and sold them to people who killed them. The spiritualist doctor used the betel leaves and produced a bad-smelling liquid with blood and pus that stuck to the leaves. This was not something that came from your own body.

But the sorcerer put this liquid on the leaves to make it look supernatural and make you feel confident about his methods so that you would feel connected with this black magic. Even the spiritualist doctor did not see what the sorcerer did. He only chanted incantations. But the sorcerer performed the actions.

2. You had a very rapid heartbeat and your heart quivered. You could not breathe quickly enough to supply your heart with oxygen. You felt your throat was constricted and could not breathe. You needed to have fingers stuck down your throat daily and vomited phlegm and blood for 3 months.
This is because of your demerit from a past life when you used old animals for labor; for example, old oxen and water buffalo. They were very tired and showed symptoms similar to yours in your present life.

3. Presently you still have the constricted feeling in your throat sometimes, as though something is stuck in your throat and there is a bone jammed in your throat. This is due to your past demerit when you played roughly with puppies and kittens. When you became angry, you squeezed their throats until they could not breathe.

You can cure this condition but you must accumulate a great deal of merit so that you can find a good doctor to treat you.

Your thyroid problem could return if you rest too little or feel very stressed. So you must make your mind clear using meditation and by resting adequately.

4. You were placed in a cavity, wrapped up like a corpse, rubbed with betel paste, and rubbed with pineapple leaves until you felt a stinging itch all over your body. This occurred even though there were not any insects when the masseuse prepared the cavity. This is because in your past you respected black magic. This led you to black magic again in your present life and caused you to be treated by the masseuse in this manner.

You felt a stinging itchiness as though insects were biting you. This is because of the insects that were in the soil at the time. There was nothing special about this. This situation is due to your past demerit from respecting black magic.

5. You and the masseuse had a gay relationship because she had abnormal gender psychology. There was no the 3rd sorcerer in her. This is combined with your past demerit from having extramarital affairs. So you came back to this type of circumstance.

The masseuse’s husband was very jealous about her. You violated the precept forbidding adultery because she was married.

6. Presently you do not have any sorcerers with you. You only have the feeling that you are still connected with the massage profession.!

But you are able to massage people all day, even though you are small and have tiny hands. This is because you have a strong belief in this profession.

The masseuse told you that she had changed the patterns on your palms in order that massage would become your belief, to make you feel confident. If we are attached to something, we make it overly important. If we are not attached, it stops having substance.

7. The man with whom you had sexual relations did not know black magic and did not cause you or the masseuse to be possessed. She spoke this way to because she was feeling possessive about you. And she was strongly attached to the practice of black magic. She was half-crazy about it. This combined with your past demerit from committing adultery. These caused you to meet that man and the masseuse.

You should stay far away from her and that man so you can end your demerit.

8. The masseuse, you, and the man with whom you had sexual relations have a connection from the past. You have demerit from extramarital sexual relations concerning both of them. All 3 of you took turns have affairs with others when you were married in the past.

You should end your involvement with these matters so that you can end the cycle of demerit. You can turn to making merit, keeping the precepts, and meditating as better pursuits. This is so you can close the path to hell and go to heaven.

9. When your younger brother drove the car to the masseuse’s house, he said “Why are you calling for my mind?” This is because he was half-crazy like you because of your belief in black magic. But in truth there was nothing to this belief.

Tell your younger brother to stop believing in this type of thing. He should turn to making merit, keeping the precepts, and meditating often as better pursuits. Merit will arise in him. He will be able to close the path to hell and go to heaven.

10. You became a masseuse because of your past connection with black magic. You also accepted the teachers so you could be a masseuse. So this set of beliefs followed you into you present life and pulled you into this career again.

You wish that in your future lives you will not have to be a masseuse. This wish must arise from your boredom and the lessening of your association with this career. And you must accumulate enough of all forms of merit. This will make your wish come true.

Paying respect to your teachers is a good moral quality that shows gratitude. It is something you should do. But it must be combined with wisdom, meaning that you should not only respect something because it has supernatural powers. Such respect for a teacher is composed of delusion because if you believe in the supernatural, it will make you fall into the cycle of these kinds of convictions. When you depart from this world, you will be able to become a sorcerer.

So you should pay respect to your teacher with wisdom, unadulterated with the delusion just mentioned. This will allow you to escape from the cycle. And you will also be able to use your knowledge to relieve people of suffering in a pure manner, following the fundamental principles of massage.

11. You took a long time before you came to the temple, although your kalayanamitra and the relative of your husband’s grandmother invited you here for more than 10 years. This is because you were separated from the Dhammakaya community for many epochs. When the merit you made in the past with the community found a path to realization, it made you find the kalayanamitra and the relatives that so persistently invited you.

You obtained satisfactory results from your Buddhist practice in past lives. But you did not practice with much sincerity. So in this life you must practice sincerely.

In this life you must keep the 8 precepts with concentration and make all forms of merit to the fullest degree. Your wish to be a man and to ordain will come true in your future lives.

Your three children made merit with the community in the past sometimes. Sometimes they made merit, sometimes they did not. They did not make merit continuously like you did when you were a supporter.

Your 2 sons have enough merit to ordain for a short period.

If they are to ordain for a long period, they must use their willpower.

In this life we meet again and diligently make all forms of merit to the fullest degree. Make the resolution that when you pass away we will all go to Tusita (the fourth level of heaven) together. Let us not miss each other.