Role Reversal

After the operation, mother had to stay in the ICU and had to rely on the breathing device and nobody was allowed to visit her. My eldest brother was very worried about mother and had discussed with the doctor asking permission to visit mother. The doctor allowed him to do so. 

 

Brother told mother to meditate while lying. Mother laid still as if she was unconscious for about seven days, mother passed away on Sunday, 1st January 2004 at the age of sixty- three. No one had seen her last moment.

My husband is a nice person but had little education and not very intelligent. His father died when he was two years old, he lived with his mother. They didn’t have a house of their own. They had to live with someone else in a sugar factory.

 

His mother got a job, climbing the coconut trees to collect sugar from coconuts to make palm sugar.

 

Once she was climbing a coconut tree she inadvertently dropped the knife, which nearly hit his head, but he escaped, still it pierced his left foot and left him with a mark till today.

 

When my husband was about five to six years old, he was very naughty. His mother used to tie him to a tree and made him inhale chili grilled in a coconut shell until he choked.

When he turned seven, he had to live at a temple as monks’ attendant and lived on the leftovers. He studied at the temple’s school and took care of himself at a tender age.

 

He used to suffer from scabies and his body was covered with pus until his temple’s friends refused to get close to him. The abbot of the temple used to cover his body with clay rich in alumina. He gradually recovered.

 

When he was fourteen years old, he worked in a cord factory and he used to sleep in the plant, which was covered with engine oil.  I felt very sorry for him.

Then he worked in an ice-cream factory but earned little money which couldn’t meet his ends. He had to eat ice-cream for food and slept in the factory.

 

At the age of sixteen he worked as a crew in a fishing boat in Mahachai district with a better income (around five to six thousand Bahts) he let his mother use his salary. Whereas himself while at sea used his share of money from selling fish that the boat owner gave to him. Each time he spent fifteen days in the sea until the boat reached Singapore and stayed on land for two days and went back to the sea for another fifteen days. He did that for about five years.

 

When he turned twenty-one he was recruited as a seaman in the Navy in Chandaburi province.

During his days off (he was in the navy for two years) he helped my third brother selling materials and we met each other there. At that time I was in my first year at University.

 

After he was discharged from the Navy, he applied for a volunteer force and was employed as a public servant.

 

Due to his honesty he got to serve a senior officer  until I completed my studies. I worked for ten years and he still followed me regularly until I took pity of him and married him at the age of thirty-eight and he was thirty-nine years old. The senior officer whom he worked for had organized everything for us.

Then this senior officer had an overseas posting, my husband obviously lost his position but he still had some superannuation. It was the same time that my son was born.

 

My husband had to become a househusband and look after our son whereas I became a breadwinner. My husband loves the family very much.

As he felt so ashamed he did all the chores including washing clothes, cooking and minding our child. I felt nothing for him. Moreover, sometimes I felt irritated and angry with him when he did something I disliked. But he didn’t get angry and also told me to calm down.

 

I worked as a public servant in a government department. In my position, I received some bribe money of which my share in some months was more than my normal salary. This money had to be shared and passed onto the officers in charge who held higher status. This practice has been done for a long time even before I joined the public service. I used this money for the family’s needs and help many of my relatives.
 

1.What kammic retribution made my mother suffer from brain tumor? My mother meditated and saw herself, was it her refined body?

 

2. Mother meditated before the operation, had it helped her worry less?

 

3. While she was unconscious for seven days how did she feel? Was she mindful?

4.What was her vision? Where is she now? We dedicated merits to her, has she received them? Does she have any message for us? 
 
5.What kammic retribution made father suffer from lung cancer. Before death father didn’t listen to your Dhamma tapes, was his vision bright or dark?

 

6.Where is father at the moment? We dedicated merits to him, has he received them? Does he have any message for us? 

 

7.Father did not like the second brother who looked after him till his last moment, what was the kamma?
 
8.What kammic retribution does my husband have for him to have dull faculty, little education, hard time at a tender age,

 

9. was tied to a tree by his mother and had to inhale chili grilled in a coconut shell, had a knife dropped on his foot, had scabies until his body was covered with pus, currently he frequently suffered from pneumonia.

 

10. What meritorious deed made my husband became a royal page but lost his job because that senior officer had an overseas posting.

 

11.How did that senior officer relate to my husband as they were attached to each other like mother and son till this day?

 

12.How was my husband and I related that made my family life different to others i.e. my husband is a house husband?

 

13.and I am a bread winner and what kamma forced me to get very angry with him for no reason?. 
 
14.Will the bribe money from my work be sinful or not.  If it is, what is the retribution and if I used this money to make merit what will be the result?
 
15.At the moment I have to work very hard but the opportunity to gain supervisory position is rare because I have to have a circle of friends and network and there should be an exchange of favours.

 

16.What merit do I lack of that didn’t give me opportunity to gain the position?
 
17.My son is nine years old, what kammic retribution made him have allergies at this young age. He often sneezes and has runny nose. He is doing quite well in his studies but very naughty. He hardly sits still.

 

18.Even at the temple, he was told to meditate but he couldn’t sit for more than five minutes, what causes that? How can this be rectified? Does he have ordination merit?

 

19.My youngest sister pursues perfection at the temple for sometime but left to do business,

 

20.how did she pursue perfection with the community? Would she have opportunity to set herself up? 
    
21.How did my husband, my son and I make merit with the community? I make merit with faith but my mind was not quite happy, how could I rectify this?

  With my thank to most respected Phra Dej Phra Khun Luang Phaw