How To Build The Habits Of The Children To Be Sincere And Clever (Mai Ngo)#8


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Meditation
Meditation for Beginners
 
How To Build The Habits Of The Children
 To Be Sincere And Clever (Mai Ngo)#8
 
The parents must use greetings to train them.
 
The parents must use greetings to train them.
 
Why Respecting Welcoming And Greeting (Bat-Ti-San-Tan) is Clever (Mai Ngo)
 
Bat Ti San Tan means “greeting”. It means that you know how to greet a good person to come in your group.
 
From the grandparents’ experiences they give us 3 important useful factors:
 
1) To practice talents for examples to the children.
 
Many parents have children who are lovely but at the same time the parents always wonder how to train the children to be talented. In Buddhism, we have an easy lesson to train the children to be talented. But most of the time they don’t know that this is a lesson for talent.
 
How do we train the children to be talented?
 
The parents must use greetings to train them.
 
Children should be trained from when they are young. Whenever a relative or teacher from school comes to visit at the house, parents should tell the children to come in no matter where the children are playing. You must send the servants to call them. When the children arrive they must bow to greet and pay respects to the visitor. Children should learn to offer refreshments and report themselves to the visitor, as to what their first mane is, what their last name is, what grade they are in, the name of the school they are in, the name of their teacher and what their latest grade was. They should answer all of the questions properly.
 
That is how the childrens’ talents will be created.
 
It looks like you get nothing from that but the truth is that the visitor will look at the children as if to say that they are very good. They will they children about school etc. Now the talents of the children begin.
 
Sometimes the visitor has some fun questions. Will the children will able to answer them? Yes they will be able to answer them, which means that the parents train the talents for the children at this point. So if any parents did not teach the children to greet the visitors, they have to be warned that they are making a mistake because the children’s talent starts from here. All of the information about the children is brought out at this point.
 
Furthermore, our grandparents can make a very good point, for instance, after the children have a question from the visitor, the grandparents will interject, “This uncle or that aunt has a good reputation, like the best mayor, the best judge or the best doctor, “ and will comment on how well each person is doing, such as they are doing the best at their job.
All these pictures will be impressed into the childrens’ mind.
 
How will these pictures be impressed into the childrens’ minds? If each person they are referring to is a good mayor, good judge, or good doctor they must have a personality like that, even if the children don’t have all the information. But the true picture of the talent and common sense will begin the training right from this spot.
 
In the opposite way if the visitor is a bad person (Sab) and comes to visit, it doesn’t matter what the child is doing. If they are reading or playing, then the grandparents should yell out, “Children we are going to talk business, we want you to play spmeplace else!” Children must hurry up and go. They must leave the area and not stay there. In the future when the children get older, and they see the bad visitor coming to the house, they will hurry up and leave. Otherwise they will be chased by the grandparents. But on any day when they see the good visitor come into the house, it doesn’t matter where they are at. The children will be summoned to the house to serve the refreshments and report themselves and the children will be able to distinguish the good visitors from the bad ones from this point on.
 
Every parent wants their children to have talent to be able to see who is good and who is bad. They want their children to know that but if all this was not taught to the children, the parents must complain to each other, “how could our children be so stupid?” The truth is, it is not the children’s fault but the parents, who never taught them, All these are easy lessons that the grandparents not only trained their children in but they also trained their daughter in-law, their niece-in-law and the servants, so everybody knows how to welcome people well and knows how not to chase people. The house will have a good reputation all over. If the family knows how to keep company with others well, the village will be willing to share knowledge and news to that house because they have good wise contact with the community. That will make the family to be more beloved and have a wider point of view.
 
The Lord Buddha realized how important it is to train in this talent so he established ‘respectfulness towards greeting’ for us to practice.
 
The more stories that parents tell children, the more dhamma the children will have in mind.
 
The more stories that parents tell children, the more dhamma the children will have in mind.
 
2) To maximize the good.
 
It the person does not have a blinded mind, s/he will become a big billboard to announce our good deeds. It doesn’t matter if anybody says we are bad. That supportive person will guarantee, “It’s not true. I worked with them before and they are not the way you say. You shouldn’t talk badly about them. These people have a good reputation.” When someone claimed that we are not good, that person might say, “It is not true. I went to his/her office and s/he is a good person. You should know him/her better before judging him/her.”
 
So without good welcoming, guests might become big billboards to announce our good or our mistakes to others as well.
 
We all possess something strange. Sometimes we meet each other today but you never know if in the next life we will meet again, so that anything we make or say will be an impression. We then give a comment in this life. If you curse them in one life you build an enemy from this greeting. You can make a kalyanamitta and have a good friend in the future too depending on each impression.
 
Our lives are so short so we should make impressions to others when we can. It will be a friend or enemy depending on your welcoming.
3) To increase our credits.
 
Knowing to invite good people to our home or job is one of our virtues. If we are not good, good people might not want to visit us ether. It is a good guarantee to us; if we are good, good people will come. If we are not good people will not come to our house.
 
If the king visits our district, we will be so proud. The people will be pleased by his kindness so we will prepare to welcome his majesty as good as we can.
 
Welcoming is increasing our knowledge and credit so it is the starter of wisdom.
 
When parents understand the reasons to respect these 7 factors well (mentioned below), they will know that practicing building them up pulls the childrens’ minds up so, practicing them is necessary. You can tell the children true stories based on the experiences of the parents. So the parents should tell the stories to children by using the parents’ own experiences and the chadoke or the stories of the past lives of the Lord Buddha. They should pick the associated story to relate to the point that the parents want to teach at that time and they should tell the children the way they like to be told. At the end the parents should ask the children to practice what they learned right away and when the children are able to do that, the parents must know how to give recognition to the children. After that, parents should convince their children to start practicing immeditately. If they perform it well, parents should give them some rewards. That will make children realize that doing well yields good results.
 
The more stories that parents tell children, the more dhamma the children will have in mind. They will have the habit of observing other’s good. They will have the habit of observing other’s good. They will be rational and have more wisdom built up later on.
 
In summary, parents would like children to be intelligent, conscious, have wisdom and be able to judge right-wrong, good-bad, proper-improper, and be great people. The children, when they grow up will have good knowledge, good skills, good Dhamma and parents should train them to have respect for the 7 factors, which are respecting the Lord Buddha, the Dhamma, the Sangha, education, meditation, not being careless, and welcoming and greeting.
 
 

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